5 Reasons Why It Is So Hard Asking For Help
Asking for help was a hard barrier to break down. I personally have struggled with it and probably always will. Although I have already asked and received the help I needed looking back these are my 5 Reasons Why It Is So Hard Asking For Help .
5 Reasons Why It Is So Hard Asking For Help
1. You Feel Like You Failed Yourself
2. You Don’t Know How To Ask
3. Fear Of Judgment
4. You Haven’t Asked God First
5. No Perfect Time
You Feel Like You Failed Yourself
I FAILED myself. At least that was what I thought.
I was supposed to be happy. My family was awesome. I had an amazing job. I was healthy. What was wrong with me? Why am I like this when I had everything I could possibly need? I FAILED myself.
The first three months of 2023 I faced multiple barriers that I wasn’t able to break down my self but I also couldn’t communicate them either. I schedule an appointment. The doctor told me I needed therapy
Therapy? I needed therapy? Well of course I knew I needed it but being told by a doctor I needed it well that was a different feeling. 10 months of therapy is what it took to turn that failure into pride.
When that feeling of failure comes over you do something you know you will be proud of. Complete a workout, drawing, or fold a whole entire basket of laundry. Do a task you know you will proud of.
Turn that feeling of failure into the feeling of pride.
You Don’t Know How To Ask
When I asked my mom for help I really didn’t ask because I didn’t know exactly what was wrong. I explained to her that I needed help but don’t know why. I was overwhelmed and didn’t know how to ask.
Not knowing how to ask for help is a hard barrier to break down. To break through the barrier you need to rip it off like a band-aid. Be straight forward. I need help. You aren’t really asking anymore you are telling.
Have confidence in yourself. Believe in yourself that you have the power to tell somebody you need help.
Tell your parents.
Tell your friend.
Tell your teacher.
I need help. Three simple words that it is okay to tell people.
Judgment From Others
I struggle with this one. Judgment and failure go hand and hand with each other. What are other people going to think when I failed not only myself but them as well? Truth is don’t think about others.
When getting help you kind of need to be selfish a little bit. Whatever help you are getting you need to put yourself first.
I try my best to not judge others so I didn’t want others to judge me. Also I mean the Bible also flat out tells us not to judge just read Matthew 7:1 and you’ll find that out pretty easily.
My fear of judgement from people was holding be back from asking for help when I needed it the most.
Asking For Help When There Is No Perfect Time To Ask
Yes I know I know God’s timing is the perfect timing… but you ever have the thought like “God whoa are you sure you got this timing thing right. You mean to tell me leaving for Colorado only a month after my nephew is born is the right timing. Hmm I don’t think so. I think you have a different calendar than me”
Truth is there will hardly ever be a perfect timing.
You can try and figure out what time is best to ask for help. Ask the person if you go out to lunch or even talk on the phone. See what time would work best for them and go from there.
It might seem like there is no perfect time to ask and while that may be true the moment you ask for help you will feel a weight lifted off your shoulder.
Asking For Help From God First
Asking for help from God may seem silly to some but it is something I wish I did first. I had so many questions for him but never did I once ask him for help. I was an independent queen.
Looking back I think wow I loved and trusted in God with all my heart …until the hard stuff came along. I call that a lukewarm Christian which can be another whole post itself. I wasn’t all in with God so how did I know to ask for help from him first.
Praying and talking to God can help you with that feeling of failure, judgment from others, it can give you confidence to ask for help, and make asking for help no matter what time it is easier.
Asking for help from God might lead you into breaking down barriers you didn’t know you had. Maybe it will lead you into therapy, or finding a friend to give you the help you are needing.
Looking back I ask myself the question of why was it so hard to ask for help.
Honestly I still don’t have the perfect answer.
Failure was the biggest factor personally when it came to asking for help. YOU ARE NOT FAILING YOURSELF WHEN YOU ASK FOR HELP. I know what you are thinking yes I am just know one day that failure will turn into pride.
You may have more confidence in asking for help than I did. Remember three simple words is all it takes. I NEED HELP. Ask the people closest to you to reach out a hand when you are in need.
Do not let judgement hold you back from asking for help. BE SELFISH. You are battling your own thoughts don’t let others thoughts hold you back either.
The timing may be perfect or it may not be perfect. ASK FOR HELP ON YOUR TIMING. You may be a structured person so you need it planned out or you may ask for help right after a mental breakdown.
ASK GOD FOR HELP. God will help you. He may not be able to do your dishes but he may be able help mentally, and ya never know when he can send a person into your life.
